Tess of the d'Urbervilles. Thomas Hardy

I seriously dislike this book. I've only read half, but the phonebook would be a more viable alternative. I can't tell you how many times I've started reading and after 2 pages start falling asleep. But then again, just to give you a background, i watched Sense and Sensibility with my mother the other day, and was laughing the whole time. We were making fun of their "mamaaas" and stupid British formalities.They can't say i love you... oh heavens no! instead they say, "i hold you in high esteem". dear chocolate, i hold you in high esteem.

So i can claim i read the whole book, i looked up the summary on wikipedia. And i hold the ending in low esteem. It seems to me Hardy fell in love with the British landscape and Tess, the protagonist, and spent too much time describing her luscious red lips, he forgot about the plot. This book could have been written in 50 pages but no. It goes on for 300 some odd pages. Every other word must be looked up in a dictionary.

But, this book got really high rating on Amazon* and while i was in the airport, a girl came up to me gushing how much she loved the book. So maybe i'm the weird one. My teacher tells me i'm heartless.

Well, i think me and my cold heart shall stick to my satires and sci fi's and generally books with plots but until then... tootaloo!

*NOTE

i reread some of the reviews on Amazon and i see i am not alone in the Tess Hate Group. Here are some quotes from reviewers:

"I don't know how this book became a classic...was it classic for its ability to put somebody to sleep...or how about sending someone into a depression or fits of anger because Tess is a moron?"

"To my mind, the only likeable character is Alec D'Urberville. Although he is supposed to be the "villain", I find him rather funny and much less annoying than Tess and Angel." SO TRUE!!

"we are told a hundred times that Tess' eye colour is somewhere between blue, violet, grey and black -- seriously, can you picture that ? "

"If anyone in authority is reading this, PLEASE take this piece of junk OFF the sylabus...PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!"

"I dare not even think of how many times I probably came close to being committed to an asylum..."

"I think Thomas Hardy invented himself a woman who would act like his cocker spaniel; no matter how much he beat the crap out of that 'faithfull friend' the poor dog would always come crawling back and lick his boots, which is pretty much how Tess acts throughout the book"

"Hardy's the kind of writer who is analogous to a storyteller that likes the sound of his voice; just because he can say something, he does."

"I would not recommend this book to anyone who would look to escape from Depression."

"I recommend this book as kindling for a fire."

"I have possibly never been so glad to finish a book"

and lastly "kill me please"

Lolita. Vladimir Nabokov

Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta: the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth.

Lo. Lee. Ta.

I'll be honest. I liked this book even while it disgusted me. It was awful... the story of a pedophile chasing after a young girl. However, it didn't earn its "classic" title through it's pornography. The prose was amazing... check this out:

"...but my brief grunts, just sufficiently articulate to sound like conventional assents or interrogative pause-fillers, precluded any evolution toward chumminess"

I think of the story as a car crash. Sickening in it's perverted nature, yet impossible to look away because it's so captivating.

I read the reflection Nabokov gave at the end, which made me look more in favor of the book. He didn't seem sleazy (I'd like to hope he's no Humbert Humbert) and he writes that Lolita has no moral in tow.

So, in conclusion. Vladimir is a story-teller, and a good one at that. His story is controversial, but it serves to make it even more riveting.

The Hours. Michael Cunningham

More than 900 pages of flirtation, really, with a sudden death at the end. People did say it was beautifully written.

This is a quote from inside the book; that is, its original intention was not to describe the Hours but really it does. The Hours is really truly beautifully written, something that was a bit lost on me. Like a child looking at a painting, i can recognize it's beauty however i don't always understand it's meaning. My friend Simone told me how much she liked the syntax [sentence structure]; I would like to say that i agree with her, but honestly, i have no clue what she talking about so i just nodded. That's not to say that the book was entirely lost on me... I could relate with a lot of the themes. So as always, here's my list:

1. Insecurities. All the characters doubt themselves, regret their decisions, want to run away. I think everybody can relate to this, and if you don't, if you've never doubted yourself, then you're a very lucky person. Sometimes I feel like dropping all my AP classes... I mean what's the worst that can happen? I'll work at McDonald's? Pshhhh. That's not so terrible. Free McFlurries right? The fear that we will fail inhibits our ability to succeed. I guess the only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
2. Growing old. Everybody ages, becomes unattractive, or grows sick. Clarissa, Virginia, Louis, Richard, Angelica, Kitty etc. Natasha doesn't like depressing books (i think?), but ironically, this is actually a super depressing book filled with multiple suicides. And the ones who don't commit suicide? They run away from their homes, regret their decisions, are hopelessly lost. [insert smiley face here?]
3. Immortality. Richard, Virginia, Louis, Clarissa, the movie stars... We all want to be remembered. We want our grandchildren to know our names and brag about us during recess even after we've passed away. We want to make an impact on the world.
4. Obligations. If Michael Cunningham was a Michelle Cunningham I would've said the author was an avaricious feminist. The woman all hate their obligations. They "want more out of life", no obligations, no pressure of domesticity. One character, Laura, bakes a cake for her husband's birthday. She has dreams of making it perfect, extraordinary. In the end, it looks like any old home-made cake, the frosting a little shmeared, the roses a little crooked. As another character describes it, the cake is "cute". like a kid's finger painting. The cake is a metaphor for aspirations. In the end, Laura throws out the cake and bakes a new one to try again. She does better however it's still not no Betty Crocker. She had dreams of becoming somebody extraordinary, however she must settle for the sub-par suburbs, something she finds hard to accept.
5. Love. Okay this part was weird. There is so much taboo in this story it rivals Michael Jackson's life. Virginia kisses her sister. Laura's son falls in love with her. Woman kissing their neighbors to try and comfort them. [at the same time making me uncomfortable]. There are 4 gay couples. Actually come to think of it, i can't think of a single straight person that isn't in some incestuous relationship. I don't know what Cunningham was trying to get at. That we don't love enough?

Summary: If you like books with cotton-candy words, you'll like this. If you like books which end with despondency, you'll like this. If you like Virginia Woolfe, you'll like this. If you like Oedipal love, you'll be enamored with this ;)

I don't know if i like this or not. I like the themes but i know I'm missing out on the language which sometimes seemed a little too verbose so...

-Sharon

The Invisible Man. HG Wells

The invisible man by H.G. Wells: science fiction but very “diet” in comparison to other sci-fi's, still an interesting read. My favorite part though is how anachronistic it is. It could've been written in the 22nd century or the 19th [when it was really written]; there are no mentions of time at all. [except that it's feb. 29 in the book ;) ]

An Intro: A strange individual arrives at the rural town of Iping covered head-to-toe in bandages with glasses bigger than those of Mary Kate Olsen. He later gets run out of Iping, uses a greedy but unreliable man, and then encounters an old colleague of his. The plot isn’t super exciting, [this is not MTV’s Real Life] & nor is it gory like Revenge Tragedies.

Themes I liked:

1. The ring of Gyges: The book questions whether or not we would be moral people if nobody was watching. The ring of Gyges, which gave invisibility to it’s owner, [of Plato’s Republic] is alluded to in the book. As I’m a very cynical individual, I’m not going to expound my theories

2. The balance of science and humanity: The towns people are portrayed as idiotical bumpkins. However, they lead their simple lives contentedly. Meanwhile, Griffin, a smart individual is portrayed as cold and callous. With no hints of compassion or even remorse, he kills his father for money, subjects cats to tortuous experiments, and all for his own gain and enjoyment. He is suspicious as he hides his books in locked cupboards, refuses to let anybody near his gadgetry, even burns his apartment to clear it of any clues it could give. I could go on but the point is that he’s not only insane but more heartless than Kanye. His indifference is correlated to his obsession with his work and his isolation, something H.G. Wells’ could personally relate to.

3. The tragic hero: Although the reader is appalled at Griffin, there is something so pitiful about him. He may think that he’s a god among mere mortals but he has no clothing, shelter and he can’t eat any food because it’ll ruin his invisibility. He suffers, has to rely on others to help him. He can’t go out in busy streets after he almost got run over by a car. He can’t even talk to anybody as they all think they’re just drunk. All simple pleasures in life are erased, he has nothing. He can’t even walk from sores on his feet. As the story goes on, he gets chased down by dogs, degraded to the point where he’s still inhuman but not in a godly way, in an animal way. He’s become a wild animal.

I don’t know if I would recommend this story. To science fiction readers, it’ll seem lame, something an elementary schooler would read. But to somebody who doesn’t read Sci Fi, they won’t enjoy the story. But if you’re stuck on a lonely deserted island equipped with nothing else, than by all means

i like this cover

The End of the Affair by Graham Greene

Graham Greene protested throughout his life at being called "a Catholic novelist."  However, Catholicism is extremely prevalent in his books as he explores moral and ethical issues.  Greene also suffered from bipolar disorder, and is quoted as saying, "unfortunately, the disease is also in one's material."  The End of the Affair, number 532 on the list and published in 1951, contains evidence of both religious thought and mental instability.  (Interestingly, though, Greene dedicated the book "to C" in the British edition and "to Catherine" in the American edition.   This woman is Lady Catherine Walston, with whom Greene carried on a lengthy affair and based the character of Sarah on.  Perhaps his own Catholicism wavered at times.) 

Sixty pages in, Maurice Bendrix seems to be the sort of man that is extremely difficult to get along with.  He has no self-esteem and depends heavily on what others think of him.  He is living in the past, in an affair that ended years ago.  He has no focus in his life and is just drifting from novel to novel, trying to find direction.  One day, he encounters Henry Miles, the husband of Sarah, whom he had an affair with some time ago.  Henry is distraught over Sarah's unusual behavior and is suspicious that she might be having an affair.  Henry asks Bendrix to go to a private investigator on his behalf, but retracts the request soon after and rushes out of the restaurant where the two are meeting.  Bendrix, however, ignores the retraction and finds himself in the office of a private investigator.  He begins taking reports from Parkis, a detective.

When Bendrix finally tells Henry what he has done, Henry realizes that Bendrix was once Sarah's lover.  In the edition of the book that I have, this event occurs on page 67, and I'm sad to say that this is as far as I got.  I never saw the Catholicism that both Sharon and Wikipedia tell me are present within the book.  I did not got to the point in the book where the reader begins to sympathize with Sarah.    At the point at which I stopped, Parkis was nothing more than a minor character encountered in passing. 

However, I do not believe my failure is a reflection of the book's content or writing style.  Rather, it's a reflection on our ignorance when choosing this book:  asking Ellie to pick a random number between 1 and 1001 and then automatically agreeing to read that book might not be the best way to go.  I'll admit that I was eager to read the book only because Ralph Fiennes' name is clearly on the front cover, and Jason Isaacs' is on the back.  After reading the part of the book that I did, though, I have very little interest in seeing the movie.   

I've chosen March's book because it sounds interesting, and hopefully I will be able to finish it by the end of the month.  And maybe someday, after I've experienced heartbreak and learned to care what William Faulkner (he says The End of the Affair is "for [him] one of the most true and moving novels of [his] time, in anybody's language") thinks, I will return to Greene's novel, and finish it.

Here's to better luck in March.   

The End of the Affair. Graham Greene

Disclaimer: The last 40 pages made me want to start slashing my wrists.

I think I’m a little too young/naive for this book. Since it deals with love, religion, affairs, etc. However, since Natasha and I bravely plunged into the shark-infested waters of the 1001 list and damnit, since I read it all I’m going to write a review about it! So here goes:

Short Summary:The book is almost anachronistic. The affair has already happened. Usually a book is about the affair not a few years after. Maurice Bendrix, the main character, is an interesting fellow. An author, he’s very critical of himself & enjoys making fun of people yet he shows traits of goodness. “I put 2 biscuits beside his bed in case he woke up later“ He’s infatuated with Sarah Miles who unfortunately is married to Henry. There aren’t too many climactic moments so this is a pretty decent summary.

A quote to start us off:

"The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, but indifference between life and death." - Elie Wiesel

The themes:

1. Fear of the end of love: Everybody in this story feels this. Parkis the PI says, "Perhaps he didn’t really trust me to remember him..." Maurice is constantly doubting Sarah, suspecting that she has other lovers. When they’re not together, he wonders if she’s physically with somebody else but when they are together, he wonders if maybe she’s thinking of somebody else at the current moment. He never trusts her, hindering his love for her. The only time he feels that she’s truly his is when they’re having sex. [lovely] However, we find out at the end by reading Sarah’s journal, that she was more in love with him than he could’ve possibly known. Henry even though he doesn’t love sarah fears that one day she’ll leave him, divorce him. It doesn’t matter that he doesn’t love her, isn’t intimate with her, but there’s still fear that she’ll leave him permanently. This fear is part of human nature though.
2. Pain. None of the characters are every truly happy. EVER. Bendrix says he finally gained respect for Henry when he began to suffer. "I could no longer patronize him; he was one of misery’s graduates." It’s as if pain is indispensable to a fully-realized life. Through pain, Sarah’s love for Maurice is heightened. [happiness annihilates us: we lose our identity]
3. Religion. This is a biggie. We’ll go character by character. Sarah- baptized a Catholic @ age 2 though she didn’t realize it finds her way back to religion. She becomes a sort of saint after her death. Her piece of hair to Smythe heals his disfigured cheek. Her book heals Parkis’ son. She causes Maurice to hate God – but in hating god, he becomes a believer. Much as he doesn’t want to be. Smythe – from his hardships, he doesn’t believe there is a god. His views are later shared by Maurice. Maurice – he doesn’t want to believe. In his torment against god, he disallows Sarah to have a catholic burial, he tears up her journal, he refuses to believe in the [miracle] of smythe’s face. As Elie Wiesel’s quote states, Maurice’s hate though is his proof of his belief. He realizes this and that makes him hate God even more.

Should you read this book? IDK that’s up to you! There's definitely some powerful universal themes present, and the book will cause you to reflect on your own personal beliefs. However, the plot line is as slow as the elderly driver in front of you. You just want to yell, "GET ON WITH IT."

but...according to Bendrix,

[a true story has no beginning and no end]